Yes, you can ask—but the answer depends on your lender and your situation
Most mortgage lenders will consider a payment skip or deferral if you ask before you miss a payment. The lender is not required to say yes, and the terms vary widely by company and loan type. Some lenders offer formal programs with set rules; others handle requests case-by-case. The key is to contact your lender as soon as you know you cannot pay on time, not after the payment is already late.
Skipping a payment and deferring a payment are different things. A skip means you do not pay that month, and the payment is forgiven—you never have to make it up. A deferral means you postpone the payment, and it gets added to the end of your loan or rolled into future payments. Most lenders offer deferral, not forgiveness. You will pay the money eventually.
Key Takeaways
- Contact your lender before your payment is due, not after it is late, to discuss options.
- Most mortgage lenders offer payment deferral (postponement) rather than skipping (forgiveness), and deferred payments are added to the loan balance or spread across future payments.
- Forbearance is a formal program some lenders offer that allows you to pause or reduce payments for a set period, usually three to six months.
- Skipped or deferred payments may affect your credit score, and the impact depends on whether the lender reports the arrangement to credit bureaus.
- If your lender denies your request, ask about loan modification, refinancing, or other hardship programs before assuming you have no options.
How to contact your lender and what to say
Call the customer service number on your mortgage statement or bill. Ask to speak with someone in the loss mitigation or hardship department—do not just explain your situation to the first representative who answers. Loss mitigation teams handle payment deferrals and other options for borrowers in financial difficulty.
Be direct about what you need: "I cannot make my payment this month. I want to discuss options to postpone or defer the payment." Have your loan number and account information ready. Explain briefly why you need the deferral—job loss, medical emergency, reduced hours—but do not oversell the story. Lenders have heard it all, and they care more about whether you can resume payments than about the reason you cannot pay now.
Ask the lender three specific questions: (1) Do you offer forbearance or payment deferral programs? (2) What are the terms—how many months can I defer, and how will the deferred amount be handled? (3) Will this arrangement be reported to credit bureaus, and if so, how? Write down the name of the person you spoke with, the date, and what they told you. If they say no, ask whether they offer loan modification or other hardship options.
Forbearance: the formal program most lenders offer
Forbearance is a structured pause on your mortgage payments. During forbearance, you pay nothing or pay a reduced amount for a set period—usually three to six months, though some programs extend longer. At the end of forbearance, you resume full payments. The deferred amount does not disappear; it is added back into your loan in one of three ways: a lump sum at the end of forbearance, spread across your remaining payments, or added to the end of the loan.
Forbearance is not the same as deferral. Forbearance is a formal agreement with specific terms and an end date. Deferral is more informal and varies by lender. If your lender mentions forbearance, ask which option applies to you—some lenders use the terms interchangeably, which can cause confusion later.
Forbearance typically requires that you are behind on payments or facing imminent hardship. If you are current and simply want to skip a month for cash flow reasons, forbearance may not be available. Some lenders will consider it anyway; others will not. Ask directly: "I am current on my payments but expect to have difficulty next month. Do you offer forbearance to borrowers who are not yet behind?"
What happens to your credit score
A skipped or deferred payment may lower your credit score, but the impact depends on how the lender reports it. If the lender reports the arrangement as a formal forbearance or deferral to the credit bureaus, it will appear on your credit report and may lower your score by 50 to 100 points, though the exact amount varies by scoring model and your current credit profile. If the lender does not report it—meaning they handle it as an internal accommodation—your credit score will not be affected.
Ask your lender directly: "Will this deferral be reported to Equifax, Experian, or TransUnion?" If they say yes, ask how it will be labeled. Some lenders report it as "deferred" or "forbearance," which is less damaging than "late" or "30 days past due." The difference matters: a reported forbearance is a note that you worked out an arrangement, while a late payment is a mark against you.
If the lender will report the deferral and you are concerned about your credit, ask whether they can report it as "current" instead, or whether they will remove the notation once you resume payments. Some lenders will negotiate this, especially if you have been a reliable borrower.
What to do if your lender says no
If your lender denies a deferral or forbearance request, ask about loan modification. A loan modification is a permanent change to your loan terms—usually a lower interest rate, a longer repayment period, or both—that reduces your monthly payment. Loan modification is not a temporary pause; it is a restructuring of the loan itself. It takes longer to process than forbearance (usually 30 to 90 days), but it lowers your payment going forward, not just for one month.
You can also ask about refinancing, though this requires that you have enough equity in your home and that your credit score is acceptable to a new lender. Refinancing replaces your current loan with a new one, usually at a lower rate or with different terms. It is not a quick fix—the process takes 30 to 45 days—but it can reduce your monthly payment permanently.
If you are behind on payments or facing foreclosure, contact a HUD-approved housing counselor. These counselors work for nonprofits and are free to borrowers. They can review your loan, explain your options, and sometimes negotiate with your lender on your behalf. Find a counselor through the HUD website or by calling 1-800-569-4287.
The difference between skipping and deferring in practice
In everyday use, borrowers and lenders often use "skip" and "defer" to mean the same thing: postpone the payment. But the legal and financial difference is real. A true skip means the payment is forgiven—you never owe it. A deferral means the payment is postponed and will be collected later. Most mortgage lenders do not offer true skips because the payment is part of your loan contract. They offer deferrals instead.
Some lenders have programs specifically called "payment skip" or "skip-a-payment," but these are still deferrals in practice. The payment is not forgiven; it is added to your loan balance or spread across future payments. Read the fine print of any program your lender offers to confirm how the deferred amount will be handled.
If a lender tells you that a skipped payment will be forgiven, get that in writing before you skip the payment. Verbal promises are easy to dispute later, and you do not want to discover months later that the payment was added to your balance without your knowledge.
Timing: when to ask and when to expect an answer
Call your lender as soon as you know you cannot make a payment. Do not wait until the payment is due or past due. Lenders are more likely to work with you if you reach out early. If you call after the payment is late, the lender may have already reported the late payment to credit bureaus, and your options may be more limited.
Most lenders can give you a preliminary answer within one to three business days. A formal forbearance agreement or loan modification takes longer—usually 15 to 30 days—because the lender needs to review your financial situation and prepare documents. During this time, continue to pay what you can, even if it is less than the full amount. This shows good faith and strengthens your case.
Ask the lender for a timeline: "When can I expect to hear back about my request?" and "If you approve this, when does the deferral start?" Some lenders will backdate a deferral to the month you requested it; others will start it the following month. Clarify this before you skip a payment.
Frequently Asked Questions
Will skipping a payment hurt my credit score?
It depends on whether the lender reports it to credit bureaus. If the lender reports the deferral as a formal forbearance or arrangement, it will appear on your credit report and may lower your score. If the lender handles it internally without reporting, your score will not be affected. Ask your lender before you defer: "Will this be reported to credit bureaus?"
Can I skip multiple payments in a row?
Most forbearance programs allow you to defer three to six months of payments, though some extend longer. You cannot skip payments indefinitely. At the end of the forbearance period, you must resume full payments, and the deferred amount will be added back into your loan. Ask your lender what the maximum deferral period is for your loan.
What if I cannot afford to resume payments after the deferral ends?
Contact your lender again before the deferral period ends. Ask about a loan modification, which permanently lowers your monthly payment, or a second forbearance period if your hardship is ongoing. Do not wait until the deferral ends and you miss a payment; proactive communication gives you more options.
Do I still owe property taxes and insurance during forbearance?
Yes. Forbearance pauses your principal and interest payment, but property taxes and homeowners insurance are usually separate. If your taxes and insurance are escrowed (paid by the lender from your mortgage payment), ask the lender whether those amounts are included in the deferral or whether you still owe them. Most lenders will continue to collect escrowed amounts even during forbearance.
What if my lender will not negotiate and I cannot pay?
Contact a HUD-approved housing counselor for free guidance. They can review your loan, explain options you may have missed, and sometimes advocate for you with the lender. Call 1-800-569-4287 or visit the HUD website to find a counselor in your area. If you are facing foreclosure, a counselor can help you explore alternatives before it reaches that point.